Seek n’ Hide

I bought you some chocolate

As mentioned in previous posts, I am really looking for “that” someone. That amazing girl I want to be with and who wants to be with me. I would make her feel special and loved. I would respect her, encourage her in whatever she chooses to do and l want her to know I’ll always be there for her.

I am looking for that someone, but it’s easier said then done. I really don’t know what to do. I have “no game”. There have been many times I genuinely met and connected with someone only to find out she’s already in a relationship which is even worst than rejection from someone that’s single.

It’s like you find this amazing lost dog in the streets, you’re immediately drawn to the dog and it is as well to you and you take care of the dog only to find out when you see the “Missing Dog” sign, a week later and you realize it’s not yours nor it ever will be yours and the owner shows up and you know you might never meet a dog like that ever again, no matter how great you are.

I’ve tried everything:, Singles events, etc. Because I am so shy/awkward, It always never works out for me. I really think I am cursed by Cupid’s evil brother “Stupid”, who just tortures the hell out of Hopeless Romantic’s than helps them.

I am at a point in my life, I really do want to meet that special someone and I know it’s not going to just fall in my lap like the million romantic comedies I have seen.

Truth of the matter is as much I am seeking that person. I am really hiding in plain sight from that person. I am so frozen in fear of the next rejection and the next rejection, I really am not seeking that person out. Maybe it’s part, I am still hoping Ms. X will give me that chance? Maybe it’s just fear of self, fear I don’t really have the looks that will ever attract anyone to me. I don’t know.

There are two women I am really into that are not Ms. X. One that person I am really friendly with that is not too “close” to me and the other is someone I consider somewhat close to me that I have recently met and really would love to know more.

I have to figure it out an approach to either of them… Even Forrest Gump, found the love of his life, right?

Wish me luck!

-V for Vinnie


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